League the Movie... Intense

I feel like this Wendy's training video is collapsing my understanding of the universe and myself

And I'm not talking about the rap at the end.

So this is what all those Bugs Bunny cartoons were about...

More BBQ Science: Wood Chips

How often Do You Add Wood Chips?

October 24, 2009 by TulsaJeff · 18 Comments

How often do you you add more chips or chunks when you are smoking meat? First off, this is only for those of you who are NOT using a “stick burner” or a smoker that only takes actual sticks or splits of wood.

Many new meat smokers do not understand the “full” concept of smoking.. they have a general idea but sometimes wonder if they need to replenish the wood chips when it stops smoking or whether to soak the wood chips or even where to put the wood chips or chunks.

I had a newcomer ask me one time if the wood chips go in the water bowl.. now this may seem basic to some but I subscribe to the notion that there are NO stupid questions and questions are how you learn and if you don’t ask questions then you never get smarter.

The answer is YES.. you do need to replenish the wood chips when they stop smoking whether that is every 15 minutes or every hour. It is different for each smoker and also depends on the method of adding wood chips to the fire.

I actually have a formula that I use and it seems to work well for me:

Keep adding smoking wood to the smoker for about half of the total cook time or until the meat reaches 140° F.

If you are having trouble with the wood chips or chunks burning up too quickly, simply soak them in water for about 30-60 minutes before you are ready to use them. This will slow down the consumption of the wood and make them last slightly longer.

I prefer not to soak the wood most of the time but as I always say.. these things are personal preference and there are no rules one way or another.

Another option if you are using wood chips is to soak one half of the wood chips in water for 30 minutes then mix half wet and half dry chips and place a single handful onto a 12 x 12 inch piece of heavy duty aluminum foil.

Wrap the foil around the chips and poke three or four holes in the top of the foil to allow the smoke to get out.

Lay the package on top of the coals or heating element of your smoker for good smoking action. Be sure to make several of these so you can have them ready once the first one stops smoking.

For the next installment of "Hope This Isn't Sexual":

League: the Teams That Never and Must Be Realized

Team Wallparty.net
Mid: Anivia
Top: Trundle
Jungle: Jarvan
ADC: Graves/Caitlyn
Support: Thresh

Team Neversaydie.de
Mid: Karthus
Top: Yorick
Jungle: Tryndamere
ADC: Kog'Maw
Support: Zilean

Team Trapstars.com
Mid: Ziggs/Gragas/Heimerdinger
Top: Teemo
Jungle: Shaco
ADC: Caitlyn
Support: Nidalee

Team Comeonandslam.biz

Mid: Kha'Zix
Top: Darius
Jungle: Jarvan
ADC: Tristana
Support: Leona

Team Stunlock.org
Mid: Blitzcrank
Top: Nautilus
Jungle: Amumu
ADC: Ashe
Support: Leona

Team Harlemglobetrotters.edu
Mid: Karthus
Top: Ezreal
Jungle: Gangplank

ADC: Ashe

Support: Lux

Team Wearetheplaneteers.jp
Mid: Brand (fire)
Top: Malphite (earth)
Jungle: Nautilus (water)
ADC: Miss Fortune (heart)
Support: Janna (wind)

I guess pie doesn't always make life better

Summoner's Rift, two men down, no chance in hell: nothing but net

So, two of our guys had their Internet go out, leaving us in a 3v5 from the beginning. It was myself, Rajir (i.e. Matt, Erik's buddy), and a random Zyra. There was no way. No way in hell. And that's when we said fuck hell, fuck death, fuck sadness, we are going to take off like a motherfucking rocket ship, filled with cocaine. Surrender at 31:45 after we wiped their team and were pushing to a base turret. GG reality and logic. Check it:

Remember this day young Cyrus, for even when you are awash in the bitter tears of defeat, the reality of this moment shall not be washed away.

"The horror. The horror."

Steak Suggestions

How to Make the Most Tender, Flavorful Steak Recipe

If you are a steak-lover, I hope that the title of this post + luscious photo is enticing enough for you to read though the entire article. Because I promise you that it’s worth it. Even if you don’t eat steak, this is a must-read…as you can impress the hell outta your carnivorean friends (and sometimes, when you’re a vegetarian in a herd of carnivores…it would just be nice to have that extra, “dude….you didn’t know that about steak???!” in your pocket.)

My entire family (including the 2 yr old kid) just adores any type of steak recipe…you could probably classify us as professional steak-eaters. In fact, it is my husband’s life-long quest to hone his grilling technique so that our steaks at home turn out charred crusty on the outside and perfectly medium-rare on the inside. With grill marks for show, of course. Seriously, we are too cheap to eat out and would rather cook a nice steak recipe at home. For the past 4 months, we have been experimenting with how to get full, juicy, beefy flavor of a ribeye with butter-knife tenderness of a filet mignon without feel like getting ripped off buying Prime cuts. And after 4 months of eating steak 2x a week, I think we’ve figured it out. So, my friends, I am offering you a very juicy secret, one that will turn an ordinary “Choice” cut of steak into a gucci “Prime” cut (And yes, I know what “Choice” and “Prime” means – it’s the marbling. The salting doesn’t affect fat content – I’m using those terms as a figure of speech and something people can relate to)

Do you know the joy of buying Choice and eating Prime? It’s like buying a Hyundai and getting a free mail-in rebate for a BMW upgrade!!!

the steak secret: salt your steaks 1 hour before cooking for every inch of thickness.

Here’s two nice pieces of regular ‘ol supermarket steak. They’re about 1.25 inches thick, so I’ll let them salt for about 1.25 hours.

Season liberally with kosher salt on both sides with kosher or sea salt. If you are used to using regular table salt, this may look like a ton of salt, but just remember that kosher and sea salt flakes are 2-3x the size of table salt.

And then just let it sit on your counter.

After 15 minutes, it will look like this — you can see how the meat’s water is starting to come up to the surface — and that some of the salt is still on the surface of the steak.

After 30 minutes, you’ll see more water:

After almost an hour:

And now 1.25 hours – see all that water?  You can also see that there’s still salt on the surface of the steak.

The next step is to discard the water, rinse the steak really well to rid of all the salt. Pat very dry. Very very dry with clean paper towels so that absolutely no moisture is left on the steak.

Then it’s time to cook.

Before y’all throw a hissy fit, just hear me out. I first learned of this technique from Judy Rodgers’ The Zuni Cafe Cookbook: A Compendium of Recipes and Cooking Lessons from San Francisco’s Beloved Restaurant. Judy massively salts her chicken before roasting, and I’ve adapted the practice to steaks. Thanks to a couple of other books (McGee’s On Food and Cooking and Alton Brown’s I’m Just Here For the Food), and a few fellow bloggers, I have an explanation of how it works.

Oh, and if the drawings look like a 3rd grader did it, too bad….YOU try drawing with a laptop touch-pad and a glass of bourbon on the rocks.

How Salting Works

All of you who season JUST before grilling – this is what you are really doing to the meat. Did you know that? All the water comes to the surface and if you don’t pat super-dry, you’re basically STEAMING the meat. Plus, your salt just sits on the surface of the steak, leaving the interior tasteless.

Now – note that only a little of the salt gets to go back into the meat. Don’t worry – you aren’t going to be eating all that salt!

Bourbon does that to me too.

I can hear it now..BUT!!! What of all the water that stayed on the surface of the meat? Aren’t you drawing all the moisture out of the meat? Will it taste like a salt lick? (*%!*%!@#!#!!! I DON’T UNDERSTAND THIS STEAK RECIPE!!!

Pull your pants back on and keep reading…